The LuhSallian
  • HEAR YE HEAR YE
  • Ijbolerie
  • Balls
  • VanGYAT
  • Yappathon
  • About Us

  • In a cat-centric DLSU, Brando proves he’s got that dawg in him

    In a cat-centric DLSU, Brando proves he’s got that dawg in him

    April 1, 2026

    The good boy who dared to wag, the ever-”pawgi” Brando fetches both friendships and catfights as he crashes through the feline order of DLSU.

  • Br. Russco Jarvina FSC to become new DLSU President

    Br. Russco Jarvina FSC to become new DLSU President

    News Feature
    April 1, 2026
  • Horses and carabaos crowd Taft Avenue as Lasallians seek alternatives amid oil price hikes

    Horses and carabaos crowd Taft Avenue as Lasallians seek alternatives amid oil price hikes

    News Feature
    April 1, 2026
  • Mars Meds’ hidden time-bending technology to keep their medicine always new

    Mars Meds’ hidden time-bending technology to keep their medicine always new

    Nota Bene
    April 1, 2026
  • You’re not you when you’re hungry (for Mingyu Snickers)

    You’re not you when you’re hungry (for Mingyu Snickers)

    Plunge
    April 1, 2026
  • UAAP referees consult TikTok for second opinions on controversial calls

    UAAP referees consult TikTok for second opinions on controversial calls

    April 1, 2026

BALITANG INA

  • Br. Russco Jarvina FSC to become new DLSU President
    News Feature

    Br. Russco Jarvina FSC to become new DLSU President

    Br. Russco Jarvina FSC has entered “Bahay ni Kuya,” becoming the first Gen Z University president, a new chapter for “a day in a life as a Lasallian.”

  • Horses and carabaos crowd Taft Avenue as Lasallians seek alternatives amid oil price hikes
    News Feature

    Horses and carabaos crowd Taft Avenue as Lasallians seek alternatives amid oil price hikes

    Faced with an oil crisis, Lasallians have found a new way to move around, settling for hoof-powered alternatives.

  • The untied knot: Breakup so bad it legalized divorce
    National Situationer

    The untied knot: Breakup so bad it legalized divorce

    Following SaBong’s 2024 split, divorce had no choice to be legalized. However, that never stopped them from exposing their deepest, darkest secrets.

  • Controversial 4.4-percent tuition bump to finance school livery
    Share ko Langkizkiz, Universitea

    Controversial 4.4-percent tuition bump to finance school livery

    Tuition hikes fund DLSU’s Uniqlo uniforms as a plan to reinstate a dress code, ensuring all Lasallians dress in neutral-toned unity.

Ijbolerie

  • In a cat-centric DLSU, Brando proves he’s got that dawg in him

    In a cat-centric DLSU, Brando proves he’s got that dawg in him

    The good boy who dared to wag, the ever-”pawgi” Brando fetches both friendships and catfights as he crashes through the feline order of DLSU.

  • You’re not you when you’re hungry (for Mingyu Snickers)
    Plunge

    You’re not you when you’re hungry (for Mingyu Snickers)

    A ferocious hunger has taken over the minds of CARATs nationwide after consuming the treat, with all fiending to grab a morsel of Kim Mingyu.

  • How do I make this about myself?
    Plunge

    How do I make this about myself?

    Defying Manila heat in a quarter-zip and a canvas tote in tow, they clutch a matcha latte in one hand and feminist literature on the other with practiced ease. “Ako lang ba ‘yung esoteric indie…

  • Tikas out, stunna in: Lasallian geng gengs hustle through discrimination
    Hanasherie

    Tikas out, stunna in: Lasallian geng gengs hustle through discrimination

    They strove their way through hate, ridicule, and classism. Now, DLSU’s young stunnas finally tell their own story.

BALLS

  • UAAP referees consult TikTok for second opinions on controversial calls

    UAAP referees consult TikTok for second opinions on controversial calls

    The UAAP recently moved to replace replay monitors with TikTok edits, making calls based on views, sad music, and “low cortisol” dance trends.

  • UAAP to implement unorthodox “call a friend” system next season across all tournaments

    UAAP to implement unorthodox “call a friend” system next season across all tournaments

    The UAAP implements a new “call a friend” system to allow legends and favorites from the past to compete against the talent of the future.

  • Spike-spike sa langit: Luis Pablo trades in the hardwood for the Taraflex
    Local Balls

    Spike-spike sa langit: Luis Pablo trades in the hardwood for the Taraflex

    Luis Pablo’s bold transition proves that even elite athletes aren’t immune to starting over.

  • Dabao Legacy: The courtside queen extends reign until UAAP S100
    Local Balls

    Dabao Legacy: The courtside queen extends reign until UAAP S100

    Patrice Dabao establishes her extremely long future as the UAAP correspondent for DLSU.

VANGYAT

  • Can’t put your phone down? Hear from a researcher on how to beat social media addiction
    Gusto ko ang nota mo

    Can’t put your phone down? Hear from a researcher on how to beat social media addiction

    Social media addiction fuels procrastination and unrealistic expectations, so an esteemed researcher offers a creative guide to break the cycle.

  • Plop down and lock in with DLSU’s newly revamped beanbags
    Booming Systems

    Plop down and lock in with DLSU’s newly revamped beanbags

    Revamped beanbags at Goks features enhanced comfort, mood-sensing colors, and cleaner amenities for a more focused and pleasant-smelling study time.

  • Stuck waiting at Br. Andrew? DLSU suggests better queuing system, not more elevators
    Gusto ko ang nota mo

    Stuck waiting at Br. Andrew? DLSU suggests better queuing system, not more elevators

    Take a magical ride to the new queuing system and an incentivized stair climbing program to ease the burden of long elevator lines at Br. Andrew.

  • Sub-zero temperatures at Henry Sy Sr. Hall causes hypothermia epidemic and student exodus
    Gusto ko ang nota mo, Nota Bene

    Sub-zero temperatures at Henry Sy Sr. Hall causes hypothermia epidemic and student exodus

    To shield Lasallians from the heat, DLSU casts a freezing spell in the Learning Commons. Even with the coolness, studying seems to be in a freeze too.

Yappathon

  • The messed-up things I learned after staying in DLSU for four years

    The messed-up things I learned after staying in DLSU for four years

    It is extremely hard to cope with what life throws at you. It does not help when your place of learning does not help at all.

  • To my glorious king, rex splode

    To my glorious king, rex splode

    My profound love for Rex Splode from Invincible knows no boundaries; I even have his face on my bed sheets and pillow covers.

  • Poking is not just a hobby, it’s a lifestyle

    Poking is not just a hobby, it’s a lifestyle

    As Facebook poking returns, efforts must be made to solidify its presence and impart its essence to society—ensuring that it endures this time around.

  • My concert addiction

    My concert addiction

    Nothing beats the crowd and hype of K-pop concerts. With a lightstick in hand, memorizing the fan chants and seeing the idols brings the experience to a whole new level.


  • HEAR YE HEAR YE
  • Ijbolerie
  • Balls
  • VanGYAT
  • Yappathon
  • About Us

The LuhSallian is REAL NEWS by REAL JOURNALISTS…or is it? 

Just in case you mistook unfettered fiction for fact, please take note this website is purely for our yearly spoof issue—all the content is satire. If you understand what that is, we offer you our sincerest congratulations. Our spoofs are known to sometimes come true.

Find the legit stuff at thelasallian.com.

Editing Bay, Fifth Floor Br. Connon Hall, De La Salle University, 2401 Taft Avenue

Manila, Philippines, Southeast Asia, Asia, Earth, Solar System, Orion Arm, Milky Way, Local Group, Virgo Super Cluster


The LuhSallian