The Philippine breakup plague that saw the end of numerous household loveteams has found its newest victim: SaBong. The hottest rising riding-in-tandem of Bongbong Marcos and Sara Duterte, who starred in top films such as Paid in Malacañang, She’s Dating the Drugster, and Diary ng Puppet, confirmed their breakup last February 30.
Chapter closed
Prior to the official announcement, Sara’s manager, Bong Gobunda, had posted cryptic stories on Instagram on February 19, a day after Marcos was found with a rumored non-showbiz third party. “It was a unity of star-crossed lovers meant to be together forever. A unity brought together for their love of opulent parties and daddy issues…until it was not,” Gobunda’s post read.
After 11 days of confidentiality, both Marcos and Sara broke their silence on Instagram, confirming the speculation surrounding their split. The couple, on their personal accounts, had posted reminiscent photos, such as their nationwide Uto-Utour during the 2022 National Elections and their many Malacañang Palace parties, and Notes App messages to their supporters.
“What Beej and I had was real. It was never for show. We were together not because we wanted to have the Palace all to ourselves, not because of our supporters whom we bribed, not because of the money that comes with our disinformation campaign—we were genuinely in love,” Sara wrote.
Meanwhile, Marcos, after retracting his Notes App statement after being accused of using ChatGPT, instead posted only a picture of him and Sara raising their hands in front of a sea of red and green during the Uto-Utour: Miting De Avance with the caption, “Ikaw at ako.”
(You and I.)
The breakup took the country by storm. Even Juan Ponce Enrile, Sara’s great-great-great grandfather, woke up from his life-extending slumber just to express his sorrows upon the two’s breakup posts. “I always saw something special, like an invisible string between the two. Perhaps it was their authoritarian fathers tying them to each other. I was holding on to my dear life to see this union last, but, alas, I did not expect to outlive yet another tragic tale,” the centenarian grieved on Facebook.
Daddy issues, modern-day Romeo and Juliet
Leaked messages between the two posted by local paparazzi news site Dispatya shed light on their quarrels. It was discovered that Sara wanted to run for president in 2028 with her father as vice president, which Marcos disagreed with since he wanted to do the same with his mother.
“Am I not enough? May kulang ba sa akin? May mali ba sa akin? Kapalit-palit ba ako.” Marcos had said in his last message to Sara—which was left on read.
(Is there something missing from me? Is there something wrong with me? Am I replaceable?)
Sara, who opened up about her side of the story to The LuhSallian, tearfully recalls the love they used to share between meetings, “Napakahirap pong i-seenzone lang si Marcos kasi he is my daylight, the love of my life, the one that got away [from tax evasion].”
(It’s hard to just seenzone Marcos because he is my daylight, the love of my life, the one that got away.)
Gobunda revealed in his daily YouTube vlog uploaded a few minutes after confirmation of the breakup that Rody “Diggity Dog” Duterte, Sara’s father and Gobunda’s rumored boyfriend, was silently mad at Marcos’ undoings, such as cuddling up with the United States instead of China, rejoining the International Criminal Court that threatens Rody’s freedom, and pushing for Charter Change “to keep the Marcoses alive and Dutertes left for dead.”
Rody also jumped immediately on the news and started openly expressing his disdain for Marcos in any public appearances, labeling him a “drug addict,” to which Marcos responded in an ambush press interview by returning the allegations. He jested, “Nurse, vet, gising na po s’ya,” accusing Roddy of being a “professional fentanyl-sniffing dog.” Sara’s brother Paolo Duterte was also in for the drama, calling Marcos “lazy, lacked ambition, and affection toward Sara.”
(He’s awake.)
The couple’s counselor, Taffy Tulfo, said in his most anticipated episode of his acclaimed talkshow, Taffy Tulfo Missing in Action, on March 1 that this has been his most elusive and persistent problem in the show’s history. “Ang love story kasi nina Ma’am Sara at Sir Bongbong ay mala-Romeo and Juliet dahil parehas silang laki sa layaw, matagal nang magkalaban ang kanilang mga pamilya, at tutol ang kani-kanilang mga angkan sa pagmamahalang ito. Ang main goal ng programang ito ay pagbatiin ang magkasintahan but in this case, mukhang malabo na po,” he lamented.
(The love story of Ma’am Sara and Sir Bongbong is like Romeo and Juliet’s because both of them grew up with a silver platter, their families had been feuding for a long time, and both of their families are against this love. The main goal of this program is to mend relationships, but in this case, it seems unlikely.)
A bigger mastermind
Dispatya reported that both Sara and Marcos signed a six-year contractual love team under former president Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo’s artist management team. Arroyo, who wishes to come back to the political acting scene after her downfall in her last medical drama, The Neckbrace, thought this power couple would help her regain momentum.
The Marcos-Duterte tandem and their love story is just one of the tricks that the former president has on her sleeve as part of a political ploy to create drama and divert attention from political matters such as the approval of the Maharlika Investment Fund, fast-tracking Charter Change in the House of Representatives, and the privatization of public utility vehicles (PUVs).
“Hello, Gorci! I believe it’s time to shake things up in the entertainment industry. Make the announcements. Stir the pot!” Arroyo said to Gobunda in a wiretapped phone call by Dispatya preceding the breakup announcement.
Arroyo took to TikTok Live to explain herself, saying, “I deny all accusations against me, and I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative. What I know for sure is that this 17-month romance was a whirlwind. They flew close to the sun, and [the sun] is: to rule over the Filipino people for as long as they can in any way.”
The LuhSallian tried to reach out to Gobunda, the Dutertes, and the Marcoses again following Dispatya’s new revelations, but all refused to further comment as they are currently “working on their unity.”
This article was published in The LaSallian‘s Spoof 2024 issue. To read more, visit bit.ly/TLSSpoof2024.